Thursday, December 9, 2010

What the...?


I have to have a HIDA scan to figure out this gallbladder stuff. I was wondering what exactly a HIDA scan was when I found this very comfortable image from the internet.

Thanks internet. Now I feel a lot better about this whole thing.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Sludge Factory

For the past six months (or if I am being honest 9 months) I have been experiencing a pain in my lower abdomen off and on. I have assumed this pain was a number of things - cramps, muscle pain, heartburn, a reaction to eating too much ice cream, etc. The pain comes on quickly and lasts for a half an hour to two hours and is gone in a flash.

On our recent trip to Illinois I again had one of these attacks. Typically my attacks happen late in the night. I'll wake up at 2:00 am suffer and then go quietly back to sleep. On this recent trip, I suffered an attack very early, around 5:00 pm or so, and Ben witnessed this. As such, he demanded that I quit putting off going to the doctor and make an appointment. He was sure I had gall stones.

Well, today I received the results of my lab work and I don't have gall stones. That's the good news. The gross news is that instead I have sludge in my gallbladder. How gross is that? I have some more testing to do in order to determine if that sucker is going to have to come out. For now, I will just walk around feeling like I need to take a shower..inside my body.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Connor Challenge

Connor is a good kid...Connor is a good kid...Connor is a good kid.

This is the current mantra that Ben and I are chanting in the Ockree house. Connor is in a very challenging mood lately. If we tell him to do something he does the exact opposite, if we punish him it results in hysterics, if we don't punish him it results in him walking all over us.

These are the days that we want to pull our hair out and wonder what on earth we are doing wrong. How can it feel like we are making so much progress for a couple of months and then all of the sudden feel like we are back to square one...or even worse, behind square one?

During these days we have been advised to watch him sleep and remember that peaceful and quiet little face during the hair ripping out moments that are sure to come during the day.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

What's it all about?

This morning Connor had a realization. God doesn't always say yes to our prayers - or better stated for Dr. Ziegler's sake God's yes isn't always what we think it will be.

Bright and early this morning Connor came and sat down on the floor in our room. He said that he had prayed to God that he would have a really good listening day and really good dreams yesterday. According to Connor, however, he had neither a really good listening day at school, at home, or good dreams last night. He then made the universal sign showing the inability to understand. He put his arms into a W shape and said, "What's that all about?"

I said that God always gives us what we need, but it is not always what we think we need and that suffering helps draw us closer to Christ. His response - "Huh?"

Hey Connor, maybe you should ask your dad about this one. It seems like a pastor type question.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

There Were Three in the Bed...

For a few weeks now Connor has been coming into our room to sleep on the floor. This has been permitted because Sophia was moved into his room and has the tendency to at least once a night make a little noise.

Last night Connor decided that sleeping on his makeshift bed on the floor was not good enough. He needed to be in our bed with us. After several attempts to get him to go to his room we gave up and he spend the night with us.

Sleeping with a five year old boy in the bed was a challenge. It reminded me of the good old days when Ben and I had a king sized bed and we could fit kids, animals, and extra pillow in bed without feeling the least bit cramped.

Last night in our queen bed I was feeling somewhere between cramped and sardine. I kept thinking about the song where there are seven people in the bed and the little one said roll over..roll over.

Friday, November 5, 2010

The Ockrees

Click here to view these pictures larger

True Love Moments

There are moments in this world where I get a mere glimpse of what true love may look like. I always love my husband and kids, but they also frustrate me, annoy me and drain me of all energy.

Every now and then I have a moment, they are always very brief, where I feel extreme love for my family. A couple of nights ago we were all walking inside after being at the YMCA and it struck me how blessed I am to have been given this beautiful family to call my own. It was just a flash of brilliant, pure and unmarked love and just as quickly as it came it was gone. In its place was the regular every day love I feel for my family.

Odd, beautiful, mysterious and gone. It is moments like these that I hold on to and cling to during the tiredness, anger and frustration that normally accompanies our days.