Simple Plans Gone Awry

Sophia is a trouble seeking missile. If there is something she can get into that could result in some sort of permanent body damage, ensure that someone calls child services on us, or cause me to spend the next hour cleaning up a mess, you can be sure that she is making a beeline for it right now.

Our town house was full of dangerous and enticing things that caused Sophia much pleasure and me a whole lot of angst such as stairs, a stone fireplace, and an oven that was extremely hot to the touch.

Our new house came with a simple and fool proof plan. All we have to do is shut the doors to any room we want to keep Sophia out of. That is it - there are no stairs, no fireplace, and I can cook in the oven without needing to stay four feet away from it to avoid 2nd degree burns. Simple and fool proof.

Then Sophia showed us her new trick.



Although she never did it for the camera, she did open that door three times. Now she can continue to enjoy her two favorite games: put my hands in the toilet water before someone stops me and unroll the toilet paper while laughing. Meanwhile, I can continue to utter the phrase "Where's Sophie?" every thirty minutes or so.

Burnt Cookies

I haven't cooked in an electric over for a couple of years. Last night I made some cookies for the kids with horrendous results.

By the term made some cookies I really mean bought some cookie dough from the store and put the little pieces on a cookie sheet. I don't have my kitchen aid mixer at the new house yet and the prospect of mixing up some cookie dough without it just seemed way to daunting.

I preheated the oven like you are supposed to (something I almost never did with my gas oven) and put the cookies in for the allotted time. About a minute before they were supposed to be done I noticed that instead of delicious cookie goodness, I was smelling burnt cookie yuckness.

As this could not possibly be due to the fact that I did anything wrong or incorrect, I have decided that it is my oven's fault. Eight cookies survived our oven's attempt to keep us from eating delicious food.

Connor ate four of them. His rationale was that if there were only eight cookies, he better eat a bunch of them so that we didn't run out. I didn't bother pointing out the flawed logic there and instead ate a couple myself. You know...so we didn't run out.

There is no place like home.

This weekend was a busy frenzy of moving boxes, unpacking boxes and setting up our new home. So far it has been a great experience. After an initial rough night with the kids, we are really enjoying the house and think that making the move was a great decision.

The house isn't too fancy, in fact I would guess that it is the smallest house in the entire neighbrohood. Even though it isn't fancy, it is pretty nice and has been kept up. I love the skylights that you can see on the roof. We don't even have to turn on the lights in the living room during the day.

Another huge perk is our back yard. It goes clear to the fence and has a pretty large concrete patio. Connor can be found here most afternoons from the moment we get home until dinner time. He is mostly trying to catch a bird or a rabbit to keep as a pet.

We have managed to get Sophia's room set up. Since she has the least amount of stuff she gets the smallest room. I think this is only fair...and she didn't complain.

Connor's room is also set up. He loves having his own room and I think it has really improved his overall disposition. It is also nice to let him do things like read books in bed before he goes to sleep now. It seems to help him settle down.

We have not finished the living room, the man cave (office), or the kitchen. More picture will be coming soon.

It's a Fort Wayne Thing.

We have experienced many benefits from our move such as another bedroom, an office for Ben, a huge back yard, and a garage. Not to mention, the kids don't have to share a room, there is a brand new kitchen, and Connor will play outside for hours on end.

What I am realizing is that there are also shopping benefits to our move. Target is literally across the street from us now! Even though I love me some Target, I do a lot of my grocery shopping at Aldi's or Walmart.

Those of you who have lived in Fort Wayne will appreciate the fact that I had nicknamed the Walmart by our apartment Ghetto Walmart. It was kind of dirty, you wouldn't want to go there at night by yourself, and you could always count on seeing some odd things.

With our move we are closer to a new Walmart, which I have nicknamed The Amish Walmart. I picked this name because the store is cleaner, I could go there at night, and...well...there are always a ton of Amish people there.

Connor likes this Walmart better too. He likes to the see the carts and buggies.

Boxes, boxes, everywhere!

Tomorrow begins our big move.

That is probably good since our house if filled to the brim with boxes.

It is also kind of bad, because now I have to help move these boxes.

If everything goes according to plan, by this time next week

I will be posting beautiful pictures of our new house.

The most adorable girl.

I think my daughter is really the most adorable baby girl in the world. Oddly enough, Ben and I are also the parents of the most handsome five year old boy in the world. I could be wrong about these things, but I don't think so.

As evidence I submit the following.

Connor Jekyll and Connor Hyde

Those of you who have spent more than five minutes in my presence have heard me complain about how difficult it is to be Connor's mom. Connor is a special kid. Special as in wear you out, make you cry, loose your temper, and force you to throw your hands up in the air in desperation all before breakfast special. I'm not going to say he is the most challenging kid in the world to raise, but I dare say that if there was a reality TV show challenge for tough kids to parent, we would do pretty well.

When Connor wants to be difficult he can be really difficult. For example a few days ago we had a conversation that went something like this.

• M - Connor, I don't want you to play with ghosts anymore.
• C - Why?
• M - Because ghosts aren't real and if they were they would be like demons and they would come from the devil.
• C - But they aren't real, so they aren't like demons and don't come from the devil.
• M - But if they were real, they would be bad.
• C - Unicorns aren't real, are they form the devil?
• M - No, they aren't real.
• C - But if they were real, would they be from the devil?
• M - Just stop playing with ghosts because I'm the Mom and I said so!

Yeah - effective parenting, right? And, you can kind of see where my whole reality TV show thing is coming from too, can't you?

Today we were able to spend time with a much rarer and highly appreciated (and rewarded) side of Connor. Just as when he wants to be awful hard to raise, he can do it with flair and gusto, when Connor is feeling like being a really good kid, he is an amazingly good kid. It's all manners and politeness, all thank you, yes Mom, sure Dad, I love you Sophie, silly riddles, and hugs. He is truly a pleasure to be around when he is in this kind of caring and thoughtful mood.

I love both sides of Connor, but I do wonder from time to time what it is that makes him think that for just one day he is going to take it easy on us.

Happy Birthday Sophia!

Today is Sophia's first birthday. A year ago she came into this world covered in goo and throwing a rip roaring fit. Today, in honor of that momentous occasion, we allowed her to cover herself in goo and throw a rip roaring fit when she didn't have any cake left to eat. Clearly some things have changed a lot in the past year and some things have remained the same.

I was worried about the cake. I decided that I may be over thinking things. Sophia would eat dirt if I put it on a plate and gave it to her. I decided to take that train of thought to its logical conclusion.



My next biggest concern was whether or not the place would look festive. We put down some plastic table covers, threw confetti on them, and put up some signs that had the number one on them. Plus, there were balloons. That's festive, right?



The third most important thing is that my daughter smeared the appropriate amount of cake on her face.



She made me proud and proved to the world that we are raising her right.



All and all I think things went well. After all, there was free pizza and free cake. That has to be worth something.

Good Choices

Why can't the carrots taste like what I really want to eat? It just doesn't seem fair.

Where's Martha when you need her?

Sophia's first birthday is on Sunday and try as I might I cannot think of any fantastically creative thing to do. We are going to have some friends over for pizza and cake, but it seems like there should be something more.

I think these feeling of inadequacy are coming from all the wonderful and talented women I know who can take a few pipe cleaners, some tissue paper, and turn a boring room into a child's fantasy land.

Currently I have some 1 year old decorations courtesy of our friends Jordan and Andrea McKinley, a cake mix, the intention to go buy some soda and water, and the hope that some how these things will make this first birthday feel special.

The good news is that she is only going to be one, and thus has no expectation of a grandiose and amazing party. As long as I take the appropriate pictures or cake in the face, and presents being opened she will never know that her first birthday wasn't the amazing extravaganza I will tell her it was.